Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I can read

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

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I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have a reading level above third grade

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

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I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Why does the God of the Bible condemn homosexual acts?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

What is a mouse breather?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

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I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t buy bullshit

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Did Harry and Meghan really get what they wanted?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Is Europe willing to risk losing its alliance with the United States, if they choose to continue the war in Ukraine?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I can count

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

How does prayer impact those in need? Is there evidence that God intervenes and improves situations based on our prayers, or is it a psychological belief?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

What was the first Native American tribe to inhabit Long Island, NY?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What should I do to get over a relationship?

I actually pay taxes

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I see through liars

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t